Agent M
On July 22, 1975 with a whimper that would make Hugh Grant look like Arnold Schwarzenegger, a baby was born to a washed up hippie wannabe father who never managed to get out of the “counter culture, consciousness expansion revolution” and a teen runaway whose brainpower couldn’t even brighten a Christmas bulb. Taking this into account, many find it astonishing that Agent M ever made it beyond the walls of the government run facility that he grew up in let alone the position of authority that he now holds at BreakfastArmada.com.
With parents such as his, is it any wonder that by age two, the government had seized Agent M and placed him in an FDA pre-approval-stage drug-testing facility? Barely clinging to life, he escaped shortly after his fifteenth birthday with the belief that there had to be someone out there who cared about him. After an existence that both Jack Kerouac and Timothy Leary would deem overindulgent, Agent M realized that he was indeed on his own, and returned home to Vancouver. It was back in Van, while recovering from a paint-thinner induced vomit session in a back-alley rehab clinic, that Agent M would run into an old friend from his days on the St. Louis party circuit (both were arrested at a midget, amputee lap-dancer’s convention). This chance meeting over brunch seemed inconsequential at the time, but to many it is regarded as the birth of the Breakfast Armada.
Dirty Johnny and Agent M, along with former gay porn star Duck-boy, would eventually manage to get their shit together, clean themselves up and realize their mutual passion for breakfast cuisine. These three are often considered the foremost aficionados of ass-enhancing, fried food and with over eighty years worth of breakfast eating between them, why the hell wouldn’t they be?
Crewman’s Log
Agent M
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